That Nigerian Girl

I am unlearning silence Learning how to say no To things that make me uncomfortable To the things that hurt me To the things that me question self-worth To the things that make me subservient I am unlearning grief Learning to let go Of the thoughts that draw me back Of the words that pierced my heart Of the laughter that mocked my spirit Of the promises that ridiculed my choice I am learning laughter Learning to hold on To the things that bring me joy To the things that flood my heart with light To the words that propel me forward To the people who bring me peace I am learning bravery Learning to say yes To the things that make me free To things passion brings my way To the path that lets my voice be heard To the one that lets my heart love To the one that leads my heart to love

I was standing at a bus stop waiting for a vehicle to convey me to my destination. Several vehicles passed me by because I was waiting to pay 50 Naira (the original fare) instead of 100 Naira that the taxi drivers who had passed charged. If you're in a hurry to get home that late you wouldn't mind  paying their stated fare and be on your way home ASAP. Not that I wasn't in a hurry to get home, I just felt it was unfair. And even though I had 100 Naira to pay I held on to the thought that sane taxi drivers would go past the bus stop I was at. Don't worry I'm not a stingy human. Random guy approaches me from my right hand side and asks where I'm headed and I respond, thinking he was an actual taxi driver. However, noticing that he was a little bit frantic, my mind immediately goes to 'one chance'. He then tells me "I can drop you off", when I didn't respond he asked me "are you scared?" I start showing visible irritation, frown...

"Madam you need to be present at her school, your daughter is insolent". I can still remember those words. On another occasion mother came, She asked that I apologize, I stared at her and shook my head..."no". "You act like you're high class". I can remember a friend say. I am most ashamed now, Of the way I lowered my chin and walked away. "I don't like the way you walk with your shoulders raised up". Right now I could smack myself, for I found myself later, Walking with my head down, eyes focused on the ground. "You laugh too loud and deep" or was it..."you laugh too much and it's weird". I should laugh now, at the way her face was twisted in disgust. They never understand. "she too dey do sef". I heard their whispers,  I want to scream at myself, for being mute and wishing I wasn't the best. After all, other people could do it as well. I have heard s...

I love the mirror It shows me what I am What I look like It reflects exactly what it sees My scars, my pain, my aches... My marks, roughness My own eyes staring back at me I watch my tears flow down my cheek I see my tongue taste it Salty in it's own bitterness I hate what it shows me I like to think this is my greatest weakness Can I accept That the mirror doesn't truly lie? That it shows me what I really am? Or can I just blink it away Assume it was never there? Am scared that if I look away I become oblivious to who I am So I love the mirror It doesn't flinch or crack I like that it can't hear me It just tells me who I am Makes me understand how they see me Bitter truth sometimes...I must say I accept what it says I nod and believe ...It's just the mirror

I sit and think Long sad painful thoughts I wonder how long before it's all over The pain, hurt and suffering The lies, cheating and deceit They say life is a journey Of ups and downs How many more downs before an up? Does our journey ever end? The tears seem to flow forever They say everything comes to an end Happiness, Joy and laughter Please don't end You give me hope That... Pain, hurt and suffering would end Or would it? At least my life would end At the end of my life Is the end of it all I have no fear for the end Because in the end It all ends...

I love Jesus a lot...a growing relationship with my father and king, getting a steady feet. I am in love with  +Beyoncé  and @Realomosexy.  Secretly waiting  for THE day I get to meet and spend time with them. Even though I have met @realomosexy once I was so starstruck I busted my chance. Plz help me make it happen. I hold Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie in high esteem since the days of #Purple Hibiscus. And her speech/talk on TED concerning feminism is a must see. I am inspired by it till this day. I am a Feminist and I believe so much in girl power. I cannot stand lies and deceit...(literally breaks my heart). Honesty for me is key. If you want to get me anything...get it in BLACK colour. I'll appreciate it more *wink. Lol, except lipstick. Music....I mean, can't even explain. There is an undeniable love and chemistry between us both. I have 3 Mums...(please don't ask). You'll find me laughing a lot and I love to make others laugh too. I criticize a...